Dearest Unborn Child,

I want you to know that as your mother, and because I will be your only parent, I believe that our relationship absolutely requires honest and open communication. I will never lie to you. I know there are some pieces of information that are best digested when you’re a little older and more mature, especially regarding the complex relationship between your biological father and myself. We can go into that later.

I need you to know straight up that I cannot take you to Disneyland. Ever. I think it’s evil. I loathe it. And this is not because I don’t love you. I don’t know you yet, but I love you. There are just some things even the most devoted parents can’t do. Please don’t ask it of me.

Love,

Mom